What Does The Family Birth Order Mean?
The Family Birth Order refers to whether one is perhaps the first born or the last born or the middle child in our family of origin (the family that we were born into). Kevin Lehman has written a book entitled ”The Birth Order Book — Why You are the Way You Are”. Below are some of his interesting thoughts!!
First Born in the Family Birth Order are people who are known for getting themselves involved in too many things. They frequently wind up with little time for themselves and are often “care takers” and “people pleasers”. They like the approval of others. They also thrive with structure. They tend to be leaders and are reliable. They like perfection. They are list makers and are well organized. They often are critical, serious and quite scholarly. Some suggestions: Work on saying “NO”. One of the Best ways to know how to say “NO” is to know your own limits. Another suggestion is to lower your sights a little. Parents have high expectations of their very first child. They in turn pass this on to the first born and the first born expects to be perfect to live up to the expectations of their parents.
Middle Child Born in the Family Birth Order are people who are mediators and tend to have fewer pictures in the family album. They like to avoid conflict and are independent. They are extremely loyal to their peer group and they have many friends. Some suggestions: Nurture your natural people skills. As a middle child one was forced in growing up to negotiate, to see both sides of the story and to deal with life as it truly is. Be sure to express yourself. Often a middle child feels their opinions are never heard.
Last Born in the Family Birth Order are people who can be manipulative and are outgoing charmers. They tend to blame others and are “show offs” to get attention as they are sometimes lost in the family and try to get their fair share of attention. They are people persons and love people around them. They tend to have a lot of friends. They are good salespeople. Often they can be disorganized and messy especially in a large family as they receive instructions from older siblings and don’t always get things straight. Some suggestions: Accept responsibility for yourself and your decision making ability and always be aware of your gifts which will make you an asset in any situation.
Where are You in the Family Birth Order in Your Family?
Remember that whatever Family Birth Order you were born into in your family, becoming AWARE is the KEY!!!! Then and only then you can start to work on life issues to make your life meaningful in relationship to yourself first and then meaningful with relationships to others around you!!